Hi! I’m Charmaine.

Today, I want to take you on a deeply personal journey—a journey of survival, resilience, and ultimately, transformation. This is my story, a story that I hope will inspire you to believe in the power of healing and the incredible potential that lies within each of us to rewrite our own narratives.

My life began with a profound sense of loss. I was given up at birth, and moved from one foster home to another, each time hoping that this might be the place where I could finally feel safe, finally feel loved. But that sense of security never came. Instead, I was eventually adopted by people who weren’t the right fit for me. I was made to feel grateful for something I didn’t choose, something that was supposed to be my new beginning but felt more like another chapter in a book that wasn’t mine.

Living with my adoptive parents was far from the safe haven I had longed for. Instead, I endured mental, physical, and sexual abuse. The trauma I experienced as a child became a template for my relationships as an adult. I found myself in partnerships where I accepted the same kind of treatment, mistaking abuse for love because that was all I had ever known. The cycle seemed endless, and the emotional scars ran deep.

I quickly learned that to survive, I had to become someone other than myself. I had to do the impossible—I had to become someone else’s daughter, someone who fit into their expectations, their world. The real me, the one who was hurting, confused, and longing for acceptance, had to be buried deep down. I wore a mask every day, pretending to be someone I wasn’t, just to get by. This was the reality of my childhood—a life where being myself wasn’t an option.

But as I grew older, the weight of living this double life became too much to bear. The trauma, the pain, the constant sense of not belonging—they all started to manifest in ways I couldn’t control. I realized that the strategies that had helped me survive as a child were now holding me back as an adult. I was stuck in a cycle of anxiety, depression, and self-doubt. I knew I had to find a way out, a way to finally be who I truly was.

My search for healing led me to a book that would change everything: The Body Keeps the Score by Dr. Bessel van der Kolk. This book opened my eyes to the reality that the body, and more importantly, the brain, holds onto trauma. It was as if a lightbulb went off—I realized that the past wasn’t just something I could leave behind. It was something that was still very much alive in my mind and body, influencing every aspect of my life.

This realization was both liberating and daunting. I knew I needed to confront the pain I had buried for so long, but I also knew that I needed the right tools to do so. That’s when I decided to study with Dr. Bessel van der Kolk himself and his team at the Kripalu Institute in Massachusetts. Through this journey of learning and self-discovery, I found NeurOptimal —a revolutionary form of brain training that would become my path to freedom. NeurOptimal allows the brain to self-regulate, to find its optimal functioning without forcing it to relive past traumas. It’s a gentle, non-invasive process that helps the brain heal itself.

As I began my neurofeedback training, I started to notice subtle but profound changes. The anxiety that had been my constant companion began to ease. My sleep improved, my mood stabilized, and for the first time in a long time, I felt a sense of peace. I was no longer just surviving—I was beginning to thrive. The mask I had worn for so long started to fall away, and I began to reconnect with the person I truly was.

This transformation didn’t happen overnight. It was a journey, and like any journey, it had its challenges. But with each session, I felt myself growing stronger, and more resilient. I was no longer defined by my past, but empowered by it. Neurofeedback didn’t just change my life—it gave me a new life. A life where I could be myself, fully and unapologetically.

As I stand before you today, I want to share a message of hope and empowerment. Our brains are incredibly powerful. They are not static, they are not fixed—they are dynamic, adaptable, and capable of extraordinary growth. No matter where you are in your journey, know that you have the power to change your story. You have the power to heal, to grow, and to create the life you truly want.

I believe that each of us holds within ourselves the capacity for profound transformation. It all starts with a single decision—the decision to take control of your own narrative, to choose healing over pain, and to embrace the journey of becoming who you were always meant to be. It’s not an easy path, but it’s one that leads to freedom, authenticity, and to a life lived fully.

So, I invite you to consider your own journey. Where are you now? Where do you want to go? And most importantly, what steps can you take today to begin your transformation? Remember, the journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. And that step can be as simple as deciding to take control of your own story.

Thank you for allowing me to share my journey with you. I hope it inspires you to embrace your own path of transformation with courage, curiosity, and an open heart. Because when we change our minds, we change our lives—and that is the true power of what neurofeedback gave me."